Discernment: The question revisited of dependence, independence and interdependence

Discernment:  To what is God calling me? That is a question each of us needs to ask ourselves on a regular basis.  We have been created to become our best selves, to rely upon God as an infant or a young child relies upon its parents/surrogate parents but to also to separate from such to develop a healthy dependency upon oneself and finally to become interdependent, recognizing our need for help, the importance of teamwork, of collaborating with others, of empowering others, of building upon the accomplishments of others.  The process of becoming our best selves and growing in maturity involves this climbing the ladder from the utter dependence of childhood and the developing independence as adolescence and  young adults to embracing the challenges of interdependence of mature adulthood.  This growth involves discerning what is asked of us as independent, separate human beings functioning from a state of individual competence to working maturely in unison, in collaboration, in reliance upon my own skills coupled with the skills of others, that is, working interdependently and in communion with others as modeled by the Trinity.

As the author of Ecclesiastes might say “there is a time for dependence, independence and interdependence.”  How well do I discern those times?

Discernment: The Human Cycle of Dependence, Independence and Interdependence

 We begin life totally dependent upon others and then move toward developing independence, a necessary prerequisite to being interdependent. Interdependence is a sign of a healthy sense of self, high self-esteem and a level of maturity that speaks of wisdom, prudence, and courage.   This latter sense of well-being is achieved only by those who have learned to take responsibility for themselves first and know when they need help. Those who are interdependent have built their “houses on solid rock,” as Jesus tells us in the Scriptures.

Discernment, as adults, means 1) that we know when others are legitimately dependent upon us and that we have a responsibility toward them, 2) that we know when it is essential that we depend upon ourselves, our abilities, our talent, acknowledge our dependence upon God working through us and guiding us and, finally, 3) that we know when  and how to work interdependently, acknowledging that we need the help and guidance of others:  Knowing  when and where to seek counsel; knowing when and in what circumstances we are powerlessness; knowing the importance of being open to and having the wisdom to  seek feedback;  in short, having the courage and the wisdom to enter into dialogue and mutual discernment in order to do that to which God is calling us as People of God, as Church, as God’s Kingdom People here on earth, members of one flock, one Shepherd, united in love as the Father, Son and Holy Spirit are one.